It’s nice that I can sit with a laptop on my knees watching the palm trees swaying in the Caribbean hurricane outside. Ok, maybe I’m jumping the gun a bit.

Let’s start at the middle because there isn’t a better place to start. If you start at the beginning you really have to have the confidence you can structure and order your thoughts so they make sense. I’m not sure I can do that. If you start at the end, you might as well just eat the ice-cream starting with the stick. Not nice.

So, I’m in my lunch break, thinking how to tell my story and how to make sure it’s worth people’s time to read it. I think everybody loves a good moan so I’ll do that. I don’t like standing still. I don’t like it, never have, and if you are a weirdy beardy psychologist, I suppose you will think it all stems from my childhood. I loved reading probably out of necessity because Sofia was quite a dirty and dangerous place when I was little. So, stuck at home, I learned to travel the world through books. Of course, nothing new here, millions of children grow up this was. I think the difference is that most of them don’t do anything about it when they grow up and just perpetuate the bullshit: ‘I can’t travel now, I haven’t got any cash!’ or ‘But I can’t leave my job now…’ Yes, judgmental old me thinks this is bullshit. Of course you can.

Forward 20 or so years and I realised I live in a beautiful country which is suffering many social problems. I will not defend Bulgaria here, it’s not what I believe in. I think that there aren’t too many good things there. How can narrow-mindedness be good? How can pollution and lack of care for your land be good? How can corruption and poverty be good? No. You don’t have to be a patriot to be a good person. I believe in this wholeheartedly. Also, on a lighter note, nobody can convince me that you have to take the rough with the smooth for some outdated idea of country borders. No, I disagree. You can practically be a citizen of the world if you choose this.

Choice. There is always choice. Sometimes, it’s not great but you always have it. Do we have a choice to love our parents, yes of course. Do we have a choice to love our country, yes. Absolutely. Do we have a choice to love ourselves. I think so, yes. People think they are amazing and yet they forget this the most simple fight or flight instinct which we all innately have. I think there is nothing shameful about flight. Not every fight is worth it. I for one do not want to be ground down by inhospitable social conditions. I don’t see the point. Why wait when you can have happiness now?!

Maybe you think this is craving the instant gratification. No, that’s different. What I’m talking about is the realisation that you don’t have to wait your whole life and displace your happiness along the way in favour of some abstract future reward or somebody else’s happiness. Egoistic? I don’t think so. Far too long have people relied on somebody else to tell them what makes them happy. Altruism, like humility, is for people who lack other qualities. Why? I think that your own happiness is your own responsibility. If you are not in control of yourself then you are not contributing to the species as much as you should. You are relying on somebody else to sort you out and you can just happily stumble through life without taking it in. You are the egoist, not me. No, I stand proud in the knowledge that my mind is so confusing that nobody else can figure it out but me. And Steve. But that’s a different blog entry 🙂

Gotta go to work. Peace and love!

 

In a few words, so this blog begins. I hope that it will be interesting and up to date. I am a simple person, I have simple dreams. They are not, however, small. That’s why I though it’s probably a better idea to unload them onto a page than to keep them crammed up in my head – it can get busy in there. SO, I will start with some stories of daring adventures from the last year. In true Star Wars style, I will probably then follow up with some retrospect on the past 6 years. Let me warn you now, you will probably be subjected to many rants and moans about dogs and all things dog related. No apologies there. Love you all, I hope I can give you something interesting to read and I hope to make some more thinking space for myself through this blog thing.